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Friday, May 11, 2012

Fingerprint Friday

There is a song by Steven Curtis Chapman that says:
I can see the fingerprints of god
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of god
And I know its true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of god

So look around you and see where YOU can see God's fingerprints. Is it in nature? Kids? Animals? Where do you see them?

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I see God’s fingerprints all over my 20-month little girl. After being married for a few years, we started trying to get pregnant. Years later, I made my first trip to see a fertility specialist who pretty much told me I was overweight. I was baffled. Bigger women than me had children. I wasn’t that big, was I?

After deep thought, my husband and I decided to forego the fertility specialist. If God wanted us to have a baby, he would let us know when the time was right. If we never had children, we had plenty of nieces and nephews to spoil. Six months later, we started debating on where to go on vacation and I started getting sick. People were constantly asking if I could be pregnant and I said no. Well, I was. The moment I found out, I just cried. Shock, happiness, fear, so many emotions. I called my husband. I called my work and told my coworker, Amy, all the while just crying away.

The longer the pregnancy, the more problems surfaced. Extreme swelling, possible gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, monitoring and more monitoring. I was admitted in to the hospital just shy of 33 weeks for them to tell me I would probably be in the hospital until my due date so they could stabilize my blood pressure and whatnot. Two days later, Kenna came into the world at 2 lbs. 11 oz.

I woke up from anesthesia scared and not feeling like anything had happened. Not understanding why my pregnancy had to be so hard when I don’t drink or smoke. When all I ever wanted was a baby and hoping she was a strong fighter—and she was. Still is.

Twenty-three days of NICU, we were going home at 3 lbs. 14 oz. and she was the tiniest, sweetest little thing in the whole wide world. Still is.

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Linked up at The Rusted Chain

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